Okay, so I'm pretty upset right now, for a few reasons. But, mostly because I'm annoyed that people come to me when they need advice, support, help, or some other sort of need. But, often times, I am left out, not told, and down right unliked because of the same character traits and nature they find so helpful when it suits their needs. I'm not sorry that I speak my truth and I have an opinion. You have the option of tossing my opinion to the side. Perhaps the reason why I upset you so bad is because maybe there is truth to something I've said..... In that case, why punish me? Perhaps I'm wrong, if thats the case, say so. We don't have to agree. Thats the great thing about having your own brain.... Is it not?
What happened to independent thought and debate? Why does everyone want to be surrounded by people who agree with them all the time? What happened to growth through difference and finding people to be in your life who will help build you up, not bring you down? I would much rather be surrounded by a strong independent person who has the balls to tell me when I'm making a mistake. Let me make my own decision, but, I respect you for taking the time to think about me, my life, and what you think is good for me. That matters!
What about the other end... So, what you don't take my advice or you throw my opinion out the window.... Fine! Its your life, do what you want!!! I understand that and respect that. Not only because I have the option to do the same in my own life with your opinion, but, also because I don't know everything in the event I'm wrong, I've just learned something new! All I expect, from myself and others, is to take advice into consideration.... Not that difficult.
Its very painful to care about people and often feel like the one forgotten and left out. Countless friendships have been dropped overnight, by the other person, with no explanation. While many stay strong for years because of the honesty and strength that my friendship offers. Don't expect me to tell you what you want to hear, I won't do it. I also don't want that from you. But, sometimes I feel like that is too much to ask.
I am also frustrated by the lack of care people take in their usage of social media. I cannot even remember how many times, I have seen things posted on facebook/Myspace/Social Media in general... Parties I wasn't invited to by people who act like they're my friend, information that should have been told to me in person, catching people in lies, and other sorts of things that are just down right hurtful.
There is talk by many people about how social media has damaged the ability for people to communicate and for relationships to be genuine. I did not have a problem with that before the last few years and social media has been around for a lot longer. I have a hard time blaming social media because its the person who chooses to act or post these things, while choosing to not think of those affected and what kind of pollution they are putting out there.
I have gotten to the point with people or "friends" and social media that basically I feel its all fair weather and mostly BS. Everyone is at a point where there is so much instant gratification, ie. only offering a like button, where truth and honesty has fallen off. I don' t think its social media's fault though, I feel that people only want to hear what makes them feel good and wants to be around only those that make them feel like everything they do is okay. Which just isn't true or realistic....
Its painful to be in my position, but, I suppose if being more alone, left out, or forgotten, is a realistic and honest position to be in, than I'll find a way to get over it. I just miss the days when I was surrounded by strong independent minded people who respect the thoughts of others even if they didn't agree and cared about each other for them. The longer I live the more I believe that moment in time in that little town of Morgan Hill was more special than any of us could have ever imagined.
Miss you.
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